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The Purpose of This Site

Once this site was just for me. It was a personal blog, journal or diary of my journey with the Lord. However one day reading it I found that this could also be a real testimony to the world. Evangelism is my heart. Jesus is my life. This is my real account of my Christian walk and revelation that I share with you. In all things take them to scripture. I do not claim to be an expert though I study, research and seek the truth daily. My purpose it to stir your heart towards the Heavenly Father so you can pursue your own Journey with the lord through his word and in spirit.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Going Back to the Well

this is an audio post - click to play


It has been some time since my last post. And though some might think that I regret not posting. This I have to say would be the furthest from the truth. I have needed to take some time off to get back to the source of where I find wisdom, love, compassion and even knowledge. I cannot continue to give what God has given me without finding a place to fill my tank so to speak. God has many times showed me that this is the case in many christians lives and namely my own. When the spirit of God comes in we splash and gush others with what God has imparted into our lives but many times seldomly do we go back to the well to refresh ourselves (at least not as often as we should). The result is regurgitated food. Either food from old or a reinterpretation of someone elses food. We become stagnant and the only interest we can bring is the interest of the one who has not heard that analogy, joke or godly vision before.

When we go to the well we get words and inspirations by God that many times cannot be duplicated or have been heard before but failed to have been documented. In other words we get inspriation that is origional and pure. Will we duplicate the words of another. Most certainly. Because that which God says to one he says to millions of others around the Globe. However each has the ability to reach certain people. However ever single time a word is given by God. The word is firstly accepted and activiated in the life of the person who heard it. God likes to kill two birds with one stone many times. He wants the hearer to hear and know and understand that when he speaks it is his life that is in line with it or at least being formed to the shape of that new curve, bend or smooth shaped pot. Forming and shaping us God speaks to all of his chosen. It is a joy to be part of that wonderful experience.

Many people wonder what it might be to be like to be able to speak to God. Some don't wonder; many do speak to him. It is a joy above and among any others to have a relationship where you are spoken to and even corrected by your creator. I love being imperfect. If it was not for the imperfectness that is me. I would not need these things and my relationship to him would not be needed. Sometimes I even fret the day if ever there be a time where I never would not need him. Perposterious! I have found a place where I can gather these things. The time I need to sometimes simply sit and talk and even cry with God. Above and beyond the praise and the rat-a-tat-tat of the drums and shouting of a choir is a far more important need to sit quietly in his precense and hear him. Many times even feel his prescense in my very body. His spirit calming and comforting. Abiding in love and joy and truth. If ever for a short while I need to close myself off from the things around me to enjoy this time there would be nothing I would regret or miss. I love this about fasting. The very most confused and mis-understood thing in a christians life. Many of times people have come to me. What sprituality can you gain by fasting? Starving yourself does not help you. First it is not about starving yourself. It is about prayer and focus on God and away from fleshly desires. Food is not the only thing you abstain from during fasting. I tend to eliminate Christian contemporary or even praise other than heartfelt praise from my listening. What is nobler to repeat the music you hear or sing your praise your heart feels. Try it one day. I promise you will not regret it. God hears and knows your desires. If you ever find yourself behind an invisable wall that keeps you from communing with God stop and listen. God is always trying to reach out to you. I have found that in my walk though many times I have stumbled and fallen and even thought about running away from it all. God wanted me tucked closely underneath him. Sometimes we are like children we refuse to eat or play out of spite or anger but when the times comes we happily will stand up and partake in joys that God has awaiting us. Many times is takes getting past that childish view first. One that I myself have held and had disabled in many ways my communioun with him.

We can minister. But many times we need to be ministered to. Though I am sure many a minister is out there to take on this task I found the greatest minister of them all is God himself. He speaks what you need to hear and seldomly ever more than what you need to hear unless indeed you do need to hear it to that capacity. He speaks in a kind and quiet voice and sometimes an abrupt and authoritive one. Each time I feel the precense of his very being like the father I never had. Saying son, walk with me. Let me show you the way. When you fall I will be here. In your victories I will be here. In your defeats I will be here. In your pain. I will be here. The key word is I. The question is; will we?

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