The Purpose of This Site

Once this site was just for me. It was a personal blog, journal or diary of my journey with the Lord. However one day reading it I found that this could also be a real testimony to the world. Evangelism is my heart. Jesus is my life. This is my real account of my Christian walk and revelation that I share with you. In all things take them to scripture. I do not claim to be an expert though I study, research and seek the truth daily. My purpose it to stir your heart towards the Heavenly Father so you can pursue your own Journey with the lord through his word and in spirit.

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

Working on Hearts

God works on peoples hearts. I think the reason for this is becasue it beyond all things is the one thing that's very nature to become decietful, hurt and against God. Recently as my Blog has continued you could see where God has made my heart soft once again. Less calculated. However I am weary of many things. Many things are changing now. My wife has recently contacted me and she wants to reconcile our relationship. We had a great time at the park with our daughter. My prayers I know are answered. Am I though where I need to be? I fret not. This brought be sheer Joy and sheer terror. I know that God wants to move me on. Can I take that step. god has been working on all of our hearts. I know this as well. What though have I been doing. In fear of loosing have I stepped forward. Or have I edged back. Sometimes though we may not say it or express it we sometimes give up. I think to an extent I did. I wondered if it was possible once again at all. I wonder seriously about what God wanted for me. For my daughter and for My wife. I did loose ground. I felt that though my faith was in God that perhaps God will was not for this marriage to come back together at all. I am reminded over and over again how God does not like divorce. Some transalations say hate. So I am steping forth in faith that I might loose it all over again. I am praying as I would hope anyone who is reading this might also that I do make the right choice that I am not guided by my heart but my spirit and that I make a decision of faith based on the direction of my father. I am faced with the delimma of divorce or living and working in a disfuntional relationship in how that God will mend and take care of it. Either way will be painful. But I ask myself which will be more profitable in the end. I do have faith. I know that it will come. I know all things will pass. Everthing will come into picture soon. However I am not faithful of myself. My own actions or my own feelings. This is where the seperation comes. To be honest my response was no never. I can not imagine returning back to that. But can God not change people and situations. I do believe he has. I am so arrogant as to say. Hey I can fall but noone else can? The bible says we must forgive 70 x 7. This is what amazes people who are not in Christ. How could he? Why should he? Why don't he? It is a stuggle. A Struggle that I cannot concieve will end. I must make a decision for it to end. A decision that could be very likly the most painful or rewarding one. God help me. PLEASE.. Help me!

No comments:

Post a Comment